The lesson of this episode? COMM – UN - IC - A - TION.
I mean, you’d think that without the modern time-wasters such as cable, the internet and Boggle, these castaways would have enough downtime to, say, have a conversation. But, no. Instead, when Claire asks what’s really going on, Charlie stares off into space, contemplatively. When Kate and company interrogate Patchie, they actually just glare at each other with a momentary inquiry: “So, the Others, man. That’s some messed up stuff. Right? Yeah?†And don’t get me started on John “Loose Canon†Locke. Whenever he wants answers, he blows things up. And then stares off into space, contemplatively.
Good talk.

THE BOARS AND THE BIRDS
We open, like many episodes before this, with an eye. This time it’s surrounded by smudgy black eyeliner. No, not Jack. It’s Claire. A gothic Claire. She’s behind the wheel of a crashed car, and when the camera pans out, we see that her mom is lying several feet away on the pavement, by way of the windshield.
On the island, Charlie plans a picnic for Claire but is interrupted by a very cryptic Des, who all-too-obviously insists that Chuck go boar hunting instead. Just then, a flock of birds soars overhead, and Claire says the first of what is to be many of this episode’s classic catchphrases:
“I think I know how to get off this island!â€ÂÂ
Apparently, Claire believes these birds are tagged, and if they can catch one and attach a note to it, the bird owners will find it.
Upon hearing Claire’s plan, Sawyer began to refer to Claire as Barbie, but remembered that — last episode — he wasn’t allowed to use nicknames. (NFW Chill-o-Meter rating for the Lost writers actually carrying a story line from one episode directly to the next, a truly unprecedented event: 4/10. In case you forgot, the NFW is a highly scientific method for determining the amount of spine-chilling shock certain Lost scenes create — where 1 = big woop, 5 = holy crap, 10 = no effing way).
ONE VERY SHORT LIST
Meanwhile, Patch divulges to his captors that they aren’t capable of understanding what’s going on. After all… they’re not on The List. They’re too angry, week and frightened. We also find out (again) that Ben isn’t the list-maker.
Just then, they come upon a clearing, marked off by a series of pylons, possibly demarcating a security perimeter around the entire Others’ community. Patchie maintains that it hasn’t functioned in years. But he also said he’s with Dharma.
This would be a good opportunity to use some of Sayid’s torture tricks on Patchie, or at least promise him a little action with Kate in exchange for some honesty. Nahhhh… let’s just kill him.
Which is exactly what Locke did when he pushed Patchie into the fancy electric fence. (NFW rating for Locke doing something completely irrational: 2/10. Normally, this would get an 11, but Locke’s gone a little loopy lately, so I’m just surprised he didn’t strip down and perform a rain dance around Patchie’s dead body.)
Instead of asking Locke why in blazes he’s acting so darn foolish, they watch him chop down a tree and build a bridge over the pylon.
A FAMILY AFFAIR
Now, back to the Hot Topic explosion that is Flashback Claire. She’s at the hospital with her mom and Aunt Lindsey. Things aren’t looking good. Her mom’s on life support with little hope of recovery. But the good news: It’s free! An anonymous donor, eh?
A few days later, a familiar face is in the hospital room. It’s Jack’s dad! I wonder what this could mean… (Segue into a totally I-think-I-changed-channels-by-accident-and-landed-on-a-Star Wars-marathon catchphrase:
“Claire [Luke], I am your father.â€ÂÂ
Dang — and I was hoping this episode would reveal that Kate and the French Lady were second cousins.
DID I MENTION THE NEED TO COMMUNICATE?
Claire and Jin nearly drop the net on one of the birds when Desmond fires his rifle, scaring the bird away. Claire confronts them on why he and Charlie are sabotaging her rescue efforts. She, once again, pulls the baby card and forbids Chuck to chill with Aaron. (Claire, let’s not use a human being as a bargaining chip. It’s bad parenting.)
She follows Desmond to the rocky beaches where he snags a bird. Finally, she asks what the eff is going on. Des nods to the rocks in the water and replies: “That’s where Charlie died.â€ÂÂ
That’s right, Des. Don’t bother telling her that he’s only Dead. In. Your. Imagination. No need to share that you Can. Time. Travel. Nah, just tell her that her boyfriend broke his neck, and then explain all those other minor details.
Claire and Charlie write a note. They mention they’ve been stranded for 80 days (that’s it?), and a lot of useless crap about new life blossoming when they could’ve mentioned that the island had, perhaps, coconuts made entirely out of gold. Give these people some incentive.
They attach the note to the bird’s tag and let it go. Just as it flies into the air, Locke stabs it with a knife.
Just kidding.
THE NEW OTHER
Kate, Sawyer and Locke (the French Lady was MIA) make their way to the Others’ village. Just then, they see Jack sprinting toward them. OMG! This is easy! Come on, Jack, come on!
But then, he loses momentum. He looks into the sky. Tom’s in the distance and he’s throwing a — a football. Jack catches it. Touchdown! (NFW rating for Jack totally turning into an Other and for a whopper of an episode ending finally worthy of Season 1 status: 8/10.)
AND I’M STILL LOST:
So, who the heck is on The List?!
Sawyer was reading The Fountainhead. There’s nothing like Howard Roark’s struggle to really make you think about your purpose in life. How is it that this one plane managed to house so many relevant, symbolic books? Did airport security search bags and remove all Candace Bushnell novels in lieu of weightier material?
On a very obvious note, something’s gotten into John Locke. He used to be the voice of reason. Or at least the voice of sanity. Now, he’s blowing up hatches left and right and causing people to foam at the mouth and bleed from the ears. Clearly, he wants to keep the island mystery a mystery. I’m thinking it’s all to do with the fact that on the island, he’s Alpha Male. He’s got his legs, and he doesn’t want anyone taking that away.
Next Week: It’s all LOCKE all the time! We’ll find out what put him in that wheelchair and… oh, that’s probably it.

Original post by Kate Schweitzer